Portside

Hello, I will be your doctor 
for today.  
My name is Dr. Robertson.
Btw, I’m not a real MD,
I’m a celebrity auto mechanic
(you may have seen me on TV
and now, on TikTok)
so I am very good at solving  
problems.
- and, oh, before we begin
we have a legal waver
for you to sign.

Basically, the waver states that for 
treatment, we don’t offer surgery,
or any disease preventative vaccines, 
or write prescriptions.

We can, however, offer you a 
Tarot reading,
oh, but only if our psychic is in,
I’m not sure if she is in yet,
or will be in today, or when . . .
(but we can check later).

Also, 
if you need to book a follow-
up appointment, perhaps you 
should do that soon 
since I will probably get fired
some time or other
in the near future.
And, oh, in addition –
and not restricted 
by the legal waver –
today, we are offering an oil 
change special, if you are 
interested.

So, have a seat
and we will begin.

Jean Chacona grew up in Ithaca, N.Y., and moved out west as an adult, living in California and New Mexico where she discovered that depression is often related to the amount of current cloud cover. Here poems have appeared widely.